Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Teach this to your kids! = ) *FUNNY*?

Poem to MOM





My son came home from school one day,


With a smirk upon his face.


He decided he was smart enough,


To put me in my place.





%26quot;Guess what I learned in Civics Two,


that%26#039;s taught by Mr. Wright?


It%26#039;s all about the laws today,


The %26#039;Children%26#039;s Bill of Rights.%26#039;





It says I need not clean my room,


Don%26#039;t have to cut my hair


No one can tell me what to think,


Or speak, or what to wear.





I have freedom from religion,


And regardless what you say,


I don%26#039;t have to bow my head,


And I sure don%26#039;t have to pray.





I can wear earrings if I want,


And pierce my tongue %26amp; nose.


I can read %26amp; watch just what I like,


Get tattoos from head to toe.





A nd if you ever spank me,


I%26#039;ll charge you with a crime.


I%26#039;ll back up all my charges,


With the marks on my behind.





Don%26#039;t you ever touch me,


My body%26#039;s only for my use,


Not for your hugs and kisses,


that%26#039;s just more child abuse.





Don%26#039;t preach about your morals,


Like your Mama did to you.


That%26#039;s nothing more than mind control,


And it%26#039;s illegal too!





Mom, I have these children%26#039;s rights,


So you can%26#039;t influence me,


Or I%26#039;ll call Children%26#039;s Services Division,


Better known as C.S.D.%26quot;





Mom%26#039;s Reply and Thoughts





Of course my first instinct was


To toss him out the door.


But the chanc e to teach him a lesson


Made me think a little more.





I mulled it over carefully,


I couldn%26#039;t let this go.


A smile crept upon my face,


he%26#039;s messing with a pro.





Next day I took him shopping


At the local Goodwill Store..


I told him, %26quot;Pick out all you want,


there%26#039;s shirts %26amp; pants galore.





I%26#039;ve called and checked with C.S.D .


Who said they didn%26#039;t care


If I bought you K-Mart shoes


Instead of those Nike Airs.





I%26#039;ve canceled that appointment


To take your driver%26#039;s test.


The C.S.D. Is unconcerned


So I%26#039;ll decide what%26#039;s best. %26quot;





I said %26quot;No time to stop and eat,


Or pick up stuff to munch.


And tomorrow you can start to learn


To make your own sack lunch.





Just save the raging appetite,


And wait till dinner time.


We%26#039;re having liver and onions,


A favorite dish of mine.%26quot;





He asked %26quot;Can I please rent a movie,


To watch on my VCR?%26quot;


%26quot;Sorry, but I sold your TV,


For new tires on my car.


I also rented out your room,


You%26#039;ll take the couch instead.


The C .S.D. Requires


Just a roof over your head.





Your clothing won%26#039;t be trendy now,


I%26#039;ll choose what we eat.


That allowance that you used to get,


Will buy me something neat.





I%26#039;m selling off your jet ski,


Dirt-bike %26amp; roller blades.


Check out the %26#039;Parents Bill of Rights%26#039;,


It%26#039;s in effect today!





Hey hot shot, are you crying,


Why are you on your knees?


Are you asking God to help you out,


Instead of C.S.D..?%26quot;


President Of Mean Moms,Karen,LOL!!!

Teach this to your kids! = ) *FUNNY*?
I read that a long time ago, and it is still just as appropriate today!


Thanks for sharing it again! I love it!





As for being too long, yeah, I think it took me an entire MINUTE to read!!!!





Also, I don%26#039;t think you meant to have a child recite it word for word, just teach them the lesson from the poem, right?
Reply:im english but that was bloody lovely xxx hehehheh
Reply:You go MOM, have this published, it is the BOMB. I wish I had this to hang on my fridge when my girls were young, hey I think I will save it for the grands. God Bless.
Reply:thank you for sharing
Reply:I loved it!
Reply:will do
Reply:Very cute and true too! LOL





(Only a parent would take the time to read and understand). :-)
Reply:Thats so hilkarious, i understood the whole thing. Its so amazing how it rhymes.
Reply:Very cute!
Reply:Ha that%26#039;s great!
Reply:LMAO!Children 2day are so clueless about life. They feel entitled 2 everything. I am struggling to make sure mine see how others have to live this will help remind them to not take it all 4 granted!!!
Reply:Lol, very very good thank you.


I think ill print this out,


and hang it on the wall,


and when my children try this out,


Ill too be on the ball,
Reply:hahahahahahahahahaha that is so funny!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply:I have this poem, I thought it was funny too.
Reply:haha...very nice!
Reply:I loved it, You go!
Reply:I couldn%26#039;t %26quot;teach%26quot; this to myself, let alone to kids. It%26#039;s way too long.
Reply:too lengthy to read....lol..



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